lifeofaphd

Proto-consciousness.... The life of a phd is fraught with really high sounding words and concepts. I mean you should see the looks we get on the metro or even sitting outside of the cafeteria sipping inordinate amounts of chai. But we have become immune to it. We have learned to find analogies and interpretations to pretty much anything - virtual, literal, real, imaginary etc etc. And we digress - a lot. What I meant to start with was the term proto-consciousness. The study and the proposal writing that comes before you actually get down to business - let me tell you it is no cakewalk. They expect a lot from their students don't they? I mean not only do you have to study the background of the area of your research[english lit, commowealth lit, american and carribean lit, social exclusion, aesthetics and philosophy, film studies, cultural studies.....and I could go on endlessly] but also come with a topic to study in that area of research. It is no CAT prep but it is no moonlight walk either. The pre-entrance study is the dark origins of the PhD program. The genesis, the proto-consciousness begins with morbid depression. There is just too much to study. And any foray into the theory sends you spiralling. The MBAs, IITians, medical people would probably read this post with amused disdain. Yeah, whatever - read 50 pages of Derrida and you would forget any sort of lip curling. Digressing again.... The study time is a dull experience of monotonous reading and reading and more reading. There is also the matter of the nagging whys from peer pressure. And the ever insistent question of uncertainty. But then proto-humans weren't pretty either and the phase is necessary. We lay the groundwork for the work to come and we are better for it. There's no point cribbing about it.